Things I'm to grown to argue about.

So, you know how people ask you questions or try to check you and you respond back by simply saying "I'm Grown"...yeah that's how I'm feeling today lol. So, let's delve into a fun but realistic topic today about things I'm to grown to explain. I have 25 quick little topics. Keep in mind some of these are my pet peeves that you may relate to.

• Being Called Picky...I'm not picky I just know what I like and what I don't ehh.

• Casual Situationships...If we're grown enough to enjoy each other's company why not? What Jhene Aiko say "We make love and then we f*ck and then you give me my space" but on a serious note then we're grown enough to discuss what this is.

  
  

• My Dating Standards... I'm not asking for much I'm asking the wrong person...understand the difference.

• Why I like being pursued... There's something attractive about a person who knows what they want and isn't afraid to show it but only if you find them attractive as well because if not...let's just say as women we know how that feels lol.

• Wanting effort and chemistry... Ok so I don't want boring just because it's "stable" and I don't want chaos just because there's chemistry. Give me both please thank ya.

• "But everybody is doing it"... Girl and??? I'm not everybody else; I know who I am.

• People who want access to me but don't want to respect me... Remember access is a privilege, not a right.

• Being pressured to rush my life... My timeline is my timeline, BYE.

• Thing's that won't matter six months from now... I've really been learning to ask myself, "Is this worth disturbing my peace over?" If the answer is no, then I move on with ease.

• Proving that I'm a good mom... Motherhood isn't a competition. I know how deeply I love my child and how hard I work in life or the sacrifices I've made by just simply being a mom.

• Explaining why I need alone time... At times I just want to be alone and enjoy my own solitude, nothing personal.

• My "type"... Ok y'all I'm not going to lie, I'm still trying to get away from my usual "type" if you know you know but seriously though my type is emotionally intelligent, consistent, attractive and knows how to communicate. Like that's so simple ughh whatever.

• Being called "bougie"... If wanting nice things, peace, good a*s food, and a clean environment makes me "bougie" then so be it.

• Someone not liking me... You don't have to, but you will respect me period.

• Who's doing more in the relationship?... I don't keep score anymore but if the relationship feels one-sided, I'm paying attention to that. I'm not arguing about it anymore just bye.

• Protecting my peace and enjoying my pleasures... You can love wine, candles, lingerie, expensive dinners, deep conversations, boxing, twerking, working with your hands and etc. I've noticed being grown is realizing femineity doesn't have one aesthetic.

• Leaving when the energy changes... I'm not begging someone to return to the version of themselves that made me fall for them BYE.

• I'm to grown to pretend I don't have standards just because I'm attracted to you... Ok ladies, I had to learn myself literally still learning lol, but you can be fine as hell and still not be for me.

Now it's about to get a lil grown grown lol...

• I'm to grown to stay somewhere just because the sex is good... A good orgasm cannot compensate for bad communication; trust me I've been there and when you take away the sex you sit there like "what the f*ck am I even doing here with him?"

• I'm to grown to confuse sexual chemistry with compatibility... Listen the bedroom can be fireeee, i'm talking explosive while the relationship on the other hand is sh*tty aka trashhhhh.

• I'm to grown to argue about who he follows... I'm not competing with Instagram boo, either make me feel secure or don't. Now see me I can care less about stuff like this but say for example he follows his ex; you bring it up and express how that makes you feel and he still doesn't unfollow... Boy bye IMMEDIATELY. Get him away from you asap!

• I'm to grown to chase a man who knows where I am... We all know that one affirmation that goes like "I don't chase, I attract." Oh okay! Act like you know!

• I'm to grown to give relationship benefits without relationship commitment... Access to me comes as a privilege and boy am I still learning this, this is a big one.

• I'm to grown to not speak up for myself... Pretty self-explanatory. I used to struggle with this as well, I still have moments.

• I'm to grown to shrink my femininity to make someone else comfortable... You can be soft, sensual, ambitious, emotional, independent, affectionate and still know exactly what you deserve and what you don't.

Thats's all I have for this post my loves, I really believe my frontal lobe is developing because I'm to grown for a lot of the bullsh*t.

At some point growing up means you realize that peace is sexier and better than confusion, consistency is more attractive than potential and being desired means nothing if you don't feel respected.

I'm to grown to chase, beg, compete, or convince someone to see my value. I'm to grown to let good chemistry (that goes for friendships as well) make me overlook bad character. I'm to grown to accept temporary attention when what I really want is genuine connections.

Because truth is being grown and sexy isn't just about looking good or being desired.

It's knowing yourself.

It's knowing what you want.

It's knowing what you'll tolerate and what you absolutely will not.

It's being soft without being naive, sensual without seeking validation, independent without being afraid of help or love, and confident enough to walk away when something no longer aligns with you.

But here's another thing about being grown : I don't confuse red flags as butterflies or ignore them.

I know the difference between someone who wants access to me and someone who wants to add value into my life.

I know that attention isn't affection, attraction isn't commitment, and good sex isn't a substitute for a good relationship.

So yes i'm still going to flirt, be soft spoken. I'm still going to love deeply,laugh crazy loud, dress the way I want, and enjoy every bit of it.

But i'm not settling just because someone swept me off of my feet or caught me off gaurd at aww.

Because at this stage of my life, I don't just want to be wanted.

I will be valued, respected, chosen and adored and this goes for all relationships in my life.

And my love's thats the big difference between being grown and changing that mindset.

And beibg grown enough to know better. Don't be in a loop my love's!